


That's them, this is us

by simkhalou



Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Episode Tag, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-10
Updated: 2016-04-10
Packaged: 2018-06-01 10:22:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,352
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6514276
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/simkhalou/pseuds/simkhalou
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A tag for episode 6x19, Malama ka Po'e</p><p>Steve has a question for Danny when he returns from Las Vegas.</p>
            </blockquote>





	That's them, this is us

 

The day Danny returns from Las Vegas, he picks up a six pack of beer and heads over to Steve's.

They sit out back, by the water and he tells Steve all about Grace's cheerleading competition. He tells him about how fantastic Grace did, how unfair the judges were, how one girl sprained her wrist, and how they watched _Bring It On_ every single night. Steve takes it all in, with a fond smile on his lips, as he slowly sips his beer. And for a little while, Danny thinks life is good. Really good.

Reality catches back up with him when Steve starts talking about work. And about Lou. Chin had kept Danny updated on the situation but he lets Steve tell him all about it anyway. There's something there, in Steve voice, that bothers Danny. But he can't quite put his finger on it.

After he finishes, they drop off into a companionable silence for a little while. Danny keeps an eye on Steve. He can tell there is something not right. It wasn't just in his voice. It's there now, too, in his eyes, in his body language. It's right there on the surface, obvious, probably even to someone who doesn't know Steve the way Danny does.

But Danny doesn't say anything, doesn't think that pressing the issue, pushing Steve to open up about what's bothering him will do any good. And he is okay to wait for him, lets him sit and stare out to the ocean in silence. Whenever he's ready to talk. Danny's right here, he's not going anywhere.

It takes a few minutes. But eventually, Steve takes a long swig from his beer and then clears his throat.

“You know, this whole thing with Lou,” he says, “it got me thinking.”

Danny waits some more, but Steve doesn't elaborate.

“'bout what?” he asks then, easy, casual.

Steve draws in a deep breath, lets it out with a sigh. “Family. Honesty.”

It's all it takes for Danny to get it, to connect the dots. And he wonders how he missed it before, how he hadn't thought of this yet. I should have been obvious, to him at least, that Lou's situation has Steve thinking back all those years, to the time when Doris McGarrett had been faced with a similar situation, when Wo Fat had come after her for killing his mother, when she had faked her death and disappeared from Steve's life.

“What would you do? If you were in that kind of situation?” Steve asks.

Danny looks over to him, finds Steve looking back at him with a thoughtful, curious expression. He doesn't know what to say to him. Danny's never really thought about it — or at least he tries not to. He knows he's making enemies in his line of work, is aware that, someday, someone might seek revenge, use his family against him. But the possibility is too abstract, too vague for him to actually have a plan, an exit strategy. He doesn't have packed bags under his own and Gracie's and Charlie's beds -- or ideas about staging his own death.

“I don't know,” he says truthfully.

Steve frowns. It's not the answer he wanted or needed to hear. Danny's answer doesn't help clear up the confusion, doesn't answer the real questions Steve's got spinning inside his head.

As a father, what would you do? Would you lie to your family about what you did and disappear when your dangerous past catches up with you? Or would you tell them, make sure they're ready to disappear with you?

Who made the right choice, Doris or Lou?

Honestly, Danny can understand them both. He understands Lou, that he wanted to keep his family close, be with them to protect them himself. And instinctively, Danny wants to think that he would maybe do the same. But he can understand Doris, too. He can understand her way of thinking, her way of protecting her family. As a father, he gets it. Anything to protect your kids, even if it means leaving them.

But as a friend, Danny sees the way her actions still hurt Steve today.

“What would you do?” he asks in return, wondering suddenly if maybe Steve's simply looking for some kind of confirmation or validation. If Steve just wants and needs to hear that what Doris did was wrong and what Lou did was right.

It's something Danny knows he can't give him. Because in a situation like that, there are no absolutes. No definitive right or wrong thing to do.

Steve averts his gaze down, to the beer in his hands. “I don't have a family,” he answers flatly. And Danny knows what he means by that. He knows what kind of family Steve is talking about. A wife, kids. He knows Steve doesn't mean the kind of family he very much has, in Danny, in Chin, in Kono, Lou, Grace and dozens of other people. But for a moment, that distinction doesn't matter. For a moment, that statement is true and heartbreaking. And it makes Danny wonder—

“So, if someone came after you, you'd just leave?” he asks, genuinely curious. He remembers the Dear Danno letter from a few years ago and doesn't know how it fits into this thought experiment. Steve had left then, had gone off on his own to find Wo Fat. He hadn't been running away. But Danny's always wondered if maybe Steve had left to keep the rest of them safe.

“I don't know,” Steve answers. Danny believes him because Steve knows he's got a lot worth staying for.

“This isn't about what I'd do or what you would do, is it?” Danny says after a beat. It's not a real question. It's his way to let Steve know that he gets it, that he understands why this is messing with his head. That he's thinking about his mother, the family he once had.

Steve looks out to the water again, longingly, like the answers to all his problems are hidden just beyond the horizon. “I wish I could stop thinking about this,” he says and sighs. “It's been almost twenty-five years.”

Danny understands that, too. He knows how tired Steve is.

“Well, what Doris did, it changed your life,” he offers. “It's okay to ask yourself how things could have been different.”

“I keep thinking, what if, you know,” Steve says and shakes his head, eyes still searching for something in the distance. “What if she'd been honest with my dad? Maybe I would have grown up with a go-bag under my bed, too.”

He pauses, closes his eyes for a moment and then looks over to Danny. It's a brief, fleeting look before his gaze drops to the ground. “I probably wouldn't be here today,” he adds.

Danny just looks at him, watches as Steve swallows thickly. It almost looks like he's trying to keep something inside but the thought forces its way out despite the effort.

“Maybe my dad would still be alive.”

The heaviness, the profound sadness in Steve's voice constricts Danny's throat.

“I should stop,” Steve decides, gives another jerky shake of his head. “There's no point—”

He breaks off, like there's no point in even finishing the sentence.

Danny wants to say something to him to make it all easier, to undo all the hurt Doris has caused. But he just can't bring himself to say anything in her defense. There's no point in that, either.

“Well, for what it's worth, I'm kinda glad you're here,” Danny says.

Steve turns his head, offers a faint smile. And suddenly, the situation is crystal clear.

“Because, honestly,” Danny continues, “if someone ever came after me, I wouldn't run or fake my death. I'd stay. I'd fight. And I gotta say, it'd be a lot easier doing that knowing you got my back.”

Steve give him a long look. His smile grows, brightens, just a little bit. “You got it,” he promises.

Nodding, Danny offers a smile in return. “Two-way street, buddy,” he says, just in case. But Steve knows.

  
  


**The End**

 


End file.
